Dear Therapist:
I know this may sound crazy, but I am sort of sad over the end of the full lockdown period. It came on quick where all of a sudden society was completely locked down with everyone in their homes. That took some time to adjust to, but now I have actually made the adjustment and now I am sad to return to the craziness of life as it was. We were only in lockdown for two months, but it also took hold quick. Presence, old fashioned activities, time to cook, time to be – it was a break from so many pressures. How to grieve the loss of lockdown?
Sincerely, Singing Leaving the Lockdown Blues
It may seem strange to you to own that you are going to miss this interesting time. Even now, writing from an area that is still locked down, there is more movement happening. It’s not the same as it was a month or two months ago when society pretty much came to a standstill and everyone was in their homes in a locked down state of affairs.
It was, as you say, a quick and hard adjustment to lock down, and now that we are able to begin to move again and be together, we know this comes with obligation, being busy, less time for self and family, and the pressures of modern day living. When we actually had a moment to take in how our lives shifted and how this felt, I think many of us felt it was a good shift on some level. No wonder you are struggling — you are going to miss parts of lockdown living.
So, one of the first things to do, which I can see you are already doing by writing in, is acknowledge your feelings of grief and sadness that the pure lockdown state is over or gradually is coming to an end depending on where you live. From there, think about what you want to do differently as lockdown lifts. Perhaps you will cook more on the weekends- instead of eating out the entire weekend as you are enjoying cooking and want this to stay in your life. Perhaps you want to walk your dog rather than having someone else do it for you as you find it fun and relaxing.
There are so many new things and ways of being that have come up during this intense time — take time with yourself to choose how you want to see your life in more normal time – perhaps more present, balanced, enjoying different activities in different ways. Also, take a look at what you really missed and what was really difficult for you and be grateful that those things are now over and that life can return in these ways for you.
Life is always changing and these past two months this has never been more true. Now is the time to act on the changes and create your own new normal. Life cannot remain locked down, but this brief interlude has been a prime opportunity to reset.
My best to you as you move from grieving the loss of the lockdown life to celebrating a new normal for you and yours.